Creative expression through the written word

Can you say No?

Silly question – I know but indulge me a bit.  Truthfully now, can you say no?

A lot of people struggle with saying no. They don’t want to disappoint people so they agree to things and then later they are eaten up with anger, guilt and remorse. Worse yet, they over-promise and under-deliver. Then the very thing they were afraid of, disappointing or letting people down is exactly what happens.

Saying no, even when it a reasonable request can make you feel guilty and like a bad person but in truth saying no can be a healthy life decision. So how do you learn to say no? Well, you start by realizing that you can’t say yes to everything because then you end up saying no to yourself.

Get over the idea that you are being selfish by protecting your own time. You aren’t going to lose someone’s respect because you are honoring your own boundaries. You’re saying “yes” to spending more quality time with your friends, loved ones, and family. You’re saying “yes” to maintaining your sanity because we all know how insane we can get by saying yes too much.

You’re saying “yes” to living a more relaxed, evenly-paced life that is centered around the things that having meaning for you and not killing yourself to do things for someone else. You’re saying “yes” to having a reasonable workload instead of burying yourself in hours of extra work because you simply couldn’t say no.

You may want to ask yourself why you are having trouble saying no. There is probably a lesson about yourself or your relationships in the answer. The more you ask yourself why you feel you can’t say no the more you will learn about yourself and those you surround yourself with.

All that being said, I firmly believe that you should say yes if feel that the task is  manageable, within your responsibility to do, or even when you owe someone a favor. Just be wise in what you say yes to and feel free to say no. It can be life changing.

 

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