Creative expression through the written word

Compliments 101

I used to be really bad at accepting a compliment until I went to a Women in Leadership Conference and one of the exercises they made us do was stand up and compliment the person to our right. They were complete strangers and to say the least it was awkward. The instructor asked us a bunch of questions about how we felt giving the compliment versus receiving it.

People actually enjoyed complimenting others way better then being complimented. Why is that? If we are all truly amazing, unique and special individuals and we all are talented in different ways why wouldn’t we want someone to recognize our gifts and talents? Why would that make us uncomfortable?

The instructor talked a lot about how bad it reflects on a person as a leader if they do not know both how to give complements and how to receive compliments appropriately. It has been years since that conference and I still think about the things they said and I really try to give compliments to people regularly.

At the conference one of the things they had us do was have another person compliments us and then before we respond to say in our head, “Yes I know” and then verbally to say thank you. Believe it or not, as funny as it sounds, it actually works. When you say, “Yes I know” inside your head it brings a smile to your face and a confidence that can be heard in your voice when you say thank you.

The key is to stop speaking as soon as you say Thank you because everything that comes after that is usually just running our mouths with all the reasons why the compliment isn’t valid. Quit denying your greatness. It starts with accepting compliments. When you begin to accept what other people see in you then it easier for you to take chances to step out of your comfort zone and do even more great things.

Life tip: Learn to give and receive compliments. The world needs more of the positive and so do you. Don’t discount it when it comes your direction.

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